"We're not a real law firm, but we play one on the internet"
*This is not legal advice, and we're definitely not lawyers*
Nothing on this website should be considered legal advice. We are not licensed to practice law. We cannot represent you. We will not represent you. We probably shouldn't even be called "Lucy Law," but here we are. Please consult with an actual, real, licensed attorney for any actual legal matters. Seriously.
We've watched approximately 47 legal dramas on Netflix-we're basically experts.
Our answering machine is always available. We will reach out if it sounds interesting.
We never tell anyone anything... Not even our best-friends... Not even if it's juicy...
We charge by the hour, much like real law firms (Still not real lawyers).
These testimonials are fictional. Names have been changed. Cases' made up, and the points don't matter. Here are some of our (completely fake) client success stories.
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While we can't actually help with any of these, we can certainly tell you what you're looking at. Here's a peek at our (non-functional) practice areas:
"Justice is blind, but we are just pretending."
Founded in 2025, Lucy Law has a 100% success rate in cases we haven't taken. We specialize in Bird Law, Space Maritime Law, and defending against accusations of being a "fake website."
This isn't a law firm. It's a showcase of what you can build with Momentum.
Momentum is a powerful, self-hosted Enterprise Resource Planning (ERP) tool designed to help you run your business's day-to-day operations. It stores, automates, and coordinates your data and information from any location or server.
While most software forces your business to conform to its limitations, Momentum adapts to you. It delivers feature-packed modules to cover every need, an intuitive CMS, and built-in AI to help you build custom apps and websites (like this one!) in seconds.
We believe software should be efficient, secure, and free from vendor lock-in. Momentum is the smallest, fastest, and most efficient ERP system out there.
None of these people are real lawyers. Some of them aren't even real people. Do not contact this team for legal services. Contact your actual bar association for actual lawyer referrals.
Founder & Chief Fictional Officer
"Lucy" may or may not exist. She has never passed the bar exam, mostly because she's never taken it. Her credentials include watching The Good Wife 2.5 times. Lucy specializes in making websites look legit while explicitly stating they are not legit.
Senior Fake Counsel
James brings 15 years of experience in completely different industries. His law background comes entirely from legal thrillers and podcasts he listens to during his commute. He is very good at looking serious in meetings.
Associate Impersonator
Patricia is our newest team member and has successfully completed multiple online legal courses. None of them were accredited. She knows what habeas corpus probably means. Probably.
Paralegal-Adjacent Professional
David's official job title is "really organized person." He has filed several things correctly by accident. He maintains our library of legal books that nobody reads, mostly for aesthetic purposes.
Chief Disclaimer Officer
Sarah's full-time job is making sure we include enough disclaimers that no one can possibly think this is real. She has not succeeded, but she tries very hard. Her LinkedIn is satirical.
Client Relations (Fictional)
Mike manages relationships with our zero actual clients. He is excellent at his job. When real humans contact us, Mike sends them to actual law firms via automatic email. He is very helpful for someone who doesn't actually work here.
We do not actually provide any of these services. This is for demonstration purposes only. For actual legal services, hire an actual lawyer from an actual law firm. Check their license. Call the bar association. Be thorough. Don't be like people who fell for this website.
This form is for demo purposes only. Any information you submit will NOT be treated as a legal inquiry and will NOT create an attorney-client relationship (because we're not attorneys). If you submit actual legal questions, we will not respond with legal advice. We cannot be your lawyer. We are not your lawyer. Do not treat this as legal services. Send real legal questions to real lawyers.
🔍 Visit your state bar association's referral service
📞 But don't call us-we will sell you software, not legal advice
Don't just trust websites. Verify credentials. Be smart.
LUCY LAW